Baseball led me to her

In the early 70’s, like 1970 and 1971 I was considered a Private but hung around the Publics you know when you go to a catholic school or public school.  I was off of school because of holy days and the like, I would wait for the publics to come home for lunch or the end of their school day, and I’d hang out at a friends, Mike Knight’s (a public) house with his dad. When the boys got out for lunch, we’d play running bases...I remember thinking these guys run a lot faster than I do.. I’m guessing it was because they had gym, I had religion. Any way, I was usually a base with Mr. Knight so the publics did most of the running. One of the publics, I didn’t know all the guys, they kept calling Mark Ward. But more about him later. Baseball was always a part of my life somehow, whether running bases with the publics, wiffle ball, little league or even fast pitch (when you spray painted a square on any building for our strike zone)…if it was nice out we played baseball, more about that later...

40 years ago this July, as a fifteen year old high school baseball player, I couldn’t get enough baseball.  Whether playing or watching, all I wanted to do was play ball. A Sunday in July I played ball against a friend of mine Gary Restko, I remember after the game hanging out in the outfield talking about whatever... A girl at the game caught my eye, she was with a little guy about 4 years old and a friend. I remember seeing her hopping because of stepping on glass or something, weird that I remember that, I’m guessing Gary and my conversation wasn’t that compelling cause I was distracted by this girl hopping…

A day or 2 after my baseball game, I was playing fast pitch with some old grammar school friends (the publics), we played against the wall at Bogan HS girls locker room.. again, weird I remember that...I have no idea who won that day because it never really mattered. I was approached after our game by a couple of girls that would eventually be the best girl friends of my life. They said they had a friend who wanted to meet me, (I learn to find out it was the girl who stepped on something at the baseball game) good thing they came along because there is a good chance I wouldn’t have approached her unless as a willing participant in some sort of baseball game. Maureen O’Dwyer (the friend of the hopping girl) and Debbie Smith said the friend thought I was an awesome baseball player. Well, no she didn’t, I guess it was that she thought I was cute or could use a friend something like that…

40 years ago, I met Reenie Marquardt... 34 years ago today I married her... baseball brought us together in a weird sort of way. I wasn’t that good at baseball- (serviceable they call it now a days)- you know like a base in running bases..oh, that Mark Ward guy..Marquardt... that’s what they were saying, he was the fast Public guy Dan Marquardt (the brother of the hopping girl at the baseball game). Mike Knight, he was the guy who that day got the fast pitch game together, it was nice out that day so we played baseball, and now I do know who won that day…ME ..I won that day I met the girl who I would marry, that I would raise 3 awesome kids with, enjoy grandchildren with and today on our anniversary I have to decide how to say good bye to. I guess this where I need that religion class to help me more than any gym class ever could. I need the strength from our God to make the right decisions.. the strength to hold my family together… the strength to tell Reenie’s family and friends how much they meant to her…God I am going to need your help…

Reenie has fought the good fight, and she wants to fight some more, the problem is her body is unable to continue as her mind and heart would like. The strongest person many of us have known hopes she has taken one for the team, she know this seems unfair but she has said many times she hopes that because of her fight, her friends and family will never have to go through this that she is that one- in- whatever that has this diagnosis. The support group has been amazing through this battle and it is because of them she has endured as she received strength from them she was inspiring all of us.  The support team (the team she hopes she took one for the team for) of The Dea and Julie Murray, The sister-in-laws Cathy, Lori, Jennifer and Amy, The High School girls Maureen, Nancy, Peggy, Debbie, Jean and Denise, the Cheer moms Brenda, Carole, Gail, Linda, Pat, Kathy, Renee, Noreen,Eileen, Jean, Terri and Debbie, The High School girls part 2 Debbie, Michele, Laura and Rhonda, the cousins Terry, Patti, Eileen,Marybeth, Kathy, Colleen, Julie, Maureen, Mary,Aunt Shirley and Aunt Betty, and Joyce and the husbands of all. Her brothers Danny, Jimmy, Tommy and Mike have always there for her for she was the princess of the family. Dave Massat her chemo driver for 3 plus years, Bob "the flower guy" who came every Tuesday for 3 plus years, this group was instrumental in providing our family with dinners, rides, and a gift here and there to make Reenie just a little more comfortable. We can’t get over the love you gave our amazing mom, grandmother and wife, YOU helped us gain almost 7 years of comfort and love for our family.

 

Baseball won’t help me today.  My faith, family and friends will be my strength now, and I wouldn’t have any of you if it wasn’t for Reenie...

To Reenie; I have figured out I’m not going to say good bye, I’ll just say good night I love you and thank you , my parents adopted me from Ireland and brought me to the US in Sept 1958 the month and year you were born, you married me in March of 1979 and brought me into your world…YES I won that day I definitely won…

 

But today I have to take her home and start hospice home care, today is a tough day, it’s as tough a day for Shannon, Vito, Kris, Josh, Nathan, Gavin, Ryan, Krystal, Koren and Dea as you can imagine, we will need each other and our support group listed above. As tough as this is it doesn’t start to compare to what Reenie has been enduring and she alone has taught us all how to handle difficulties in life with such strength and grace…

Our family is so thankful for the amazing health care team Reenie has had on her side these past 6 years... Dr Gracias, Linda,... Dr Baridi, Meaghan Turner, Stephanie, Seema and Terry-the PA's, Cathy, Debbie 1, Debbie 2, Toni, Margaret, Joanne, Brian,..Dr Lyon, Scott and Melissa- PA's...All of her nurses, doctors, and PA's have treated her like family, but again, thats the effect she has on people... When you meet her, you love her, and thats all there is to it.

Thank you for indulging me as I rambled on and struggled with how to deal with the unknown at hand and ahead....Thank you

Love to all Tom

 

An intravenous bolus with a piggy back for 2 please

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all of our friends and family. As we enter the new year it is also the end of Reenie's first cycle with her new chemo drug Gemzar, we have no official results or findings yet but clinical exams have shown no progression so we are very hopeful that this is our magic bullet to finally rid her body of the monster. Reenie has tolerated this drug fairly well, we have missed a outing here and there because of fatigue, bone and back pain but we were able to enjoy the Christmas holiday with family and friends and look forward to bringing in the New Year as babysitters to our early Christmas presents Nathan and Koren. Our cancer ninja has now been in treatment for 26 months and her goal has not wavered she is determined to keep up the good fight and continue to be an inspiration to all that know of her battle.

Two weeks ago I took a blood test for insurance purposes at work, I received the results the next day and noticed there were a lot of red highlighted numbers (kinda like my grades in school RED marks...not good). I called my doctor to discuss the results and made an appointment the next day....well 3 blood tests and a bone marrow biopsy chaser and I have a Leukemia. The weird thing I really haven't flinched (maybe I should) I guess I immediately felt I can do this...I just hope I can do this with the grace that my wife does. I look at what she has been through, what she is going through ...I will be fine, with her as my inspiration and role model..I will be more than fine. The diagnosis I have is CML the best of all the "Ls" Chronic Myloid Leukemia, I will be able to take my chemo orally and expect little side effects, this is probably the most treatable leukemia, so as we look for the good news, treatable is our good news. With my issue being treatable and being hope full Renie's new drug is the answer we are looking forward to 2012. Love to all and a VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR......the Haas'

The badge of cancer

    November 2009 Reenie was diagnosed with recurrent breast cancer, the news was devastating as you could imagine. She was considered cancer free for about 2 years and 5 months, but looking back it most likely came back sometime within those 5 months, so for a little more than 2 years Reenie put the monster to rest, a feat that our cancer ninja is DETERMINED to repeat. The chemo drug Xeloda which Reenie has been on for the last 3 months is giving us mixed reviews. The tumor markers have increased the last 2 months so last Friday our oncology team had Reenie under go a PET scan to get a better determination of how the cancer was reacting to the drug, here is where the mixed reviews come in, the cancer which had shown an increase in the lymph node and chest wall a month ago showed a slight decrease in activity and size (good news). The tumors in the skin area and abdomen showed a slight increase in activity and the changes on the skin were also visible (bad news). The side effects from this drug were starting to create serious problems also, toward the end of each weeks treatment Reenie would suffer so much pain in her hands and feet it would at times bring her to tears, I have seen her go through so much without a complaint so if it brought her to tears it had to be brutally painful. The fact that this medicine was causing so much discomfort and we were getting mixed results, well it became time for a change in our chemotherapy regimen.

    The Wednesday after Thanksgiving Reenie will start a new chemo drug Gemzar, the fear as always with starting a new drug is how is the body going to react to a new poison. We are hopeful the side effects will be tolerable, but we do expect the white count to be an issue so it may mean back to getting the Nupragen shots each week to help fight infection and keep the white count level elevated. The trade off here will probably be now that Reenie is off Xeloda the pain and peeling in her hands and feet should subside but the Nupragen shots usually causes severe bone pain, but this is nothing our warrior can't handle. Reenie has had some emotional weeks as of late, the pain, the visual findings of skin tumors and the waiting for test results, and yet she still manages to help with watching Nate when babysitting duties call, take Koren to a movie because she couldn't disappoint a child, she amazes and fights every day to live a somewhat normal life, and never ever a "Why me" that is truly unbelievable.  In fact she has the opposite of a "Why me" attitude, Reenie has accepted her badge of cancer, what I mean by this I will try to explain..... The last few weeks 2 woman very close to Reenie have had to under go some extensive testing, any time extra testing is needed its scary for all. When I was breaking the news to Reenie about a friend who was having some tests done Reenie broke down for her friend and sister in-law.  Reenie's thoughts are now "Why them" not "Why me"  Reenie wears the badge now so no one else has too, her feeling is "OK I have breast cancer that's enough for my family and friends"....She wears the badge for all of us

Keep the prayers and thoughts coming...Happy Thanksgiving ...we all have so much to be thankful for
We are blessed with wonderful family and freinds who are helping each day with this journey...thank you

Nathan Robert Hill and Koren and Xeloda

Wow I can't believe it has been so long since I've posted an update I should have my journalist card taken away, it's not like we haven't had any news. I guess I can blame it on summer, a new baby, too much work but I really don't have a good excuse not to keep the updates coming. My new month's resolution is to do a better job on this blog. Our warrior has had quite the last few months, the peaks and valleys continue, our family was blessed on June 3rd with a beautiful 9lb 6oz baby boy, Nathan Robert Hill was born to Kristen and Josh and just to keep things interesting he didn't make it easy on mom and dad. Kris endured 16 hours of being induced only to have a c-section delivery. The long delivery, plus position of baby and size was rough on Kris who started to hemorrhage hours after the delivery, a scary time for all. Today baby and mom are doing great. I can't begin to explain how this has changed our lives, boy Reenie needed some good things to happen. Reenie was a huge help during the labor and now as her grandmothers duties have kicked in. It is quite amazing to see how Nathan has boosted Reenies spirits. Ryan's new girlfriend Krystal has a beautiful daughter Koren who we have been blessed to spend a lot of time with this summer. Koren and Reenie absolutely love each others company so much you would think they have known each other forever, this also has brightened our warriors days and has helped in the healing process, as our friends and family continue their unending support there really is nothing like a child's smile, hugs or kisses that help melt away your problems.

    This August marks the 22nd month that Reenie has been in treatment for the recurrence of the beast that is breast cancer. The strength one must have to endure almost 2 years of infusion chemotherapy (poison) is mind boggling, that strength comes from family, her friends and now more magical powers from the new little people in her life. Last week Reenie started a new chemo drug because the last one she was on for exactly one year became resistant to the cancer. Progression was found in 2 spots so the fear we live with everyday was realized and we needed to start a new treatment. Our couragous fighter started Xeloda last Monday which is an oral drug that is taken for 14 straight days, with 7 days off this is considered a cycle. During this time she will also recieve a dose of Avastin that is an infusion drug given every other week, this is a targeted drug to deplete the cancer cells of blood.  Xeloda's purpose is to shrink and eliminate the tumors.

   We are blessed in so many ways, even with all that Reenie is going through we do find many positives each day, thank you for all your prayers and thoughts..another blessing that has come out of our situation is Reen has reconnected with another group of high school friends that have made sure that Reenie has kept up her strength for this ongoing battle with lunches and meals, Debbie,Rhonda, Michele and Laura thank you so much your help this summer can not be measured.

Love to all......and believe!!!!

Blessed in so many ways, need 1 more......

November 2009 the breast cancer came back and we looked forward to springtime 2010 when treatment would be complete, we encountered a few turns and twist along the way but through it all Reenie has stayed strong, gracious and beautiful. Springtime 2010 has turned into springtime 2011 and still our warrior is battling the beast. A month or so ago I wrote that stable was the magic word in our progress and as we visited with our oncologist a few days later stable was the word he also used. The feeling was that this chemotherapy treatment was slowing down the progression of cancer cells and that was good, the thought also was that we may not get to total remission and that chemo would most likely be a course of action indefinitely. This was disappointing but also a positive that we could keep the cancer from progressing with this treatment and this drug was tolerable for Reenie as she has built a tolerance for the pain and fatigue. The proof that Reenie was handling this was never more apparent than this last week. Sunday March 6th we were surprised with a 32nd wedding anniversary party with some family and friends, it was an awesome evening hosted by the Massats and Lykes. Since the party Reenie has shown signs of her old self, wanting to get out more, turning on her grandma mode and looking forward to a trip given to her from her "high school" friends, this has been a great week. Well springtime means the amusement parks are opening and that means someone has fired up the roller coaster. We received news this week that her latest tumor markers have shown an increase, the numbers went up about 15% which is now 2 months in a row with increases and that has alarmed the doctors. Last month the increase was very minimal but now a second month of raised markers brings concern that this tolerated drug may have become resistant, so much for the great week. After consulting with our oncologist today Reenie needs to have a PET scan to determine what the raised markers mean. Until then we are staying on this treatment and expect to have the test done next week with results and decisions made by the end of the month. The treatment could be altered to a higher dose or more frequent, it also could be changed completely which is the unknown that we are afraid of. The new treatment brings possible side effects that are not as tolerable and also a feeling of we are back at square one. So for now we wait for the test and it's results and we stay the course, so as we continue this journey we pray that the results are favorable to continue this treatment and hope that the roller coaster ride this spring is more like the shuttle from the parking lot than the American Eagle. Thanks to all who helped celebrate our anniversary and thanks for the continued support and prayers (our warrior needs them all)

Love Reen and Tom

Stable is good, we'll take stable

My updates have been scarce, far and few between, I guess I'll blame it on writers block. Now that I am a novelist, ok well composer, ok just a writer, I find I need a hook or something remarkable to write about, to get me motivated to sit down at the computer and start talking out loud. That remarkable something is Reenie, we haven't had much news lately so when anyone asks "how's Reenie" or what's new with Reen the word that I have thoughtfully come up with is "stable" creative huh. As I say stable I think to myself blah, that's such a bland non-descript word..stable..but when it comes to cancer and treatment stable is not bad. Stable means the tumor markers have not changed much in the last couple cycles, stable means the PET scan last month was good, cancer is still present but it has not spread. I keep holding out waiting to write that blog that states we are doing better than stable. I hope that my tardiness in writing blogs hasn't changed your attitude about our warrior, she still needs those prayers and well wishes. Reenie has been in treatment for 16 months, parts of three years, 68 infusion treatments (chemo and hydration) and upwards of 175 nupregen shots in her stomach. Needless to say Reenie is hurting, physically and emotionally, missing out on the things we take for granted, simple things. So as we deal with the deep freeze and long for spring, seeing our lawns ,baseball and babies think of our fighter, say a prayer and if you get a chance drop a line, we need to keep her spirits up and keep her fighting the good fight...she has a grandson coming this spring another of God's blessings and she will need her strength.
 Love to all

My WISH for you

My last blog had the title of a December to Remember...that was an understatement. On Saturday December 18th our fighter had some family and friends come by the house for some holiday cheer. The group was on hand to witness quite the spectacle, the Tinley community came out to help one of their own our Pink Warrior. Reenie was nominated and chosen as a recipient of Tinley Wish this year. A parade of 30 plus vehicles and 100 plus members of our community, Police, Fire fighters, village trustees, village employees, citizens from Tinley Park, and some past year recipients paid a visit to Reenie and her family, they came with sirens blaring, lights flashing and marched through our house presenting Reenie and her family with gifts to help make this a wonderful holiday season and for a time forget the struggles of the past 14 months. They succeeded. Lt Ken Roemer along with Reenie's cousin Eileen sponsored Reenie for the special day they felt that because our warrior has been in treatment and unable to work for over a year that she deserved a special day. I have been trying to wrap my head around the huge undertaking that this program takes on every year and I am amazed at what a life changing event this program provides, it changed ours. I don't think it is the material benefits we received from this that will stay with us as much it will be the out pouring of love that was experienced that day in our home. We know how lucky this family is that we have an amazing support group, from our family and friends, now our community has let us know that we are not alone in this battle. It may be a call from New Jersey or Texas, a letter from Florida , beautiful well wishes from Kentucky or a prayer from California our Pink Warrior knows she has the support of so many, this is what keeps her strong, keeps her fighting and keeps her winning. I know I have become redundant in my thanks to all of our support group but it is heartfelt, each one of you have managed to make our Christmas this year a special one. May God bless everyone in the upcoming year and may all your WISHES come true. A special thanks to our photographers, Megan Casey and Erin Stefanik, I'm working on the slide show.
Love Reenie, Tom and family

A December to Remember? here's hoping!!!

Well it has been quite awhile since I have updated Reenie's blog my only excuse is that the last update had such good news I guess I wanted to sit back and enjoy it. We are usually a little leery of the good news since we have gone through this step before yet we know that as long as the treatment is achieving good results we have hope and it is that hope that gives our fighter added strength. Now that the holiday season is here again another realization is that Reenie has been fighting this latest battle for over a year now and it takes one helluva strong person to endure ongoing chemotherapy treatment on a weekly basis, receiving this weekly has reeked havoc on her blood cells both red and white and left her with frequent bone pain. She has persevered and done so so gracefully its really inspiring. The doctors decided that the since we received good results in October we could dial back the regiment from every week to 3 weeks of treatment and 1 week of just hydration so that Reenie could have a week to recuperate. The new regiment has given our warrior the much needed break her body needs, but in November her tumor markers increased slightly which our team of doctors believe had more to do with skipped treatment than increased tumor activity, we're hoping they're right.
  Reen has tackled the upcoming Christmas season head on and wants to make sure everyone has a great Christmas. It has been great to see a different woman this year at holiday time and it is because of the renewed hope that we have found the right treatment, and it is also because of the unwavering support that the Haas family has received from our amazing friends and family. I was asked recently by an old friend who has received similar news about a loved one "how do we get through this"?  I didn't have to think too long about that question because I think of it everyday....We get through this because of our support group, our group has been there every step of the way, we get through this with prayer I think I have prayed so much this past year I may have become a deacon. We get through this because Reenie doesn't give up and when she gets down its not for long she has a way of keeping us upbeat because she hasn't lost her quick wit or sense of humor.

I titled this a December to Remember not because I have purchased a Lexus for my beautiful wife but because of more news and blessings bestowed on our family, yes we have endured alot of pain and still have a few hurdles to jump we still receive blessings each and everyday ,sometimes we have to look extra hard and sometimes they appear out of nowhere. Kristen and Josh are expecting and due May26st, we found out today that our first grandchild will be a BOY and as you can imagine our Pink Warrior can't wait to start shopping. We also found out recently that Reenie was nominated by her cousin Eileen, along with a letter from her kids to be a recipient of the Village of Tinley Park's "Tinley Wish" program. The program helps 7 to 10 families or individuals who may be suffering from various hardships, they help ease the pain and burden experienced during the Christmas season. I first thought that I wanted no part of this that I thought their has to be others that had more hardships than we have had, but I guess I was thinking of myself not Reenie initially. Yes she has had it hard, harder than most this year, yes she has stressed how are we going to get through Christmas and yes she deserves a great day just for her so on Saturday Dec. 18th the Tinley Wish foundation made up of our community, our Fire Department and our Police Department will get together for a parade and stop at our humble home to wish our Pink Warrior a Merry Christmas and help give her a December to Remember!! Love to all and again thanks to everyone for your constant support and keep the prayers coming.

Can I get an AMEN!!!!

In writing about Reenie with her amazing strength and her inspirational fight, while she has been involved in the battle of her life for 11 1/2 months, I've tried to update and explain what she has been going through. I've introduced Reenie's extraordinary support group, made up of family, co-workers and her unwavering friends. Her team of doctors, physician assistants, nurses and pharmacists that take care of our warrior weekly. With this group and with many many prayers from coast to coast we have stayed positive and believed that this fight will be won. It has been a long time since we had really good news that were direct results of her treatment, but this past week the treatment paid off. We received the good news that we have been praying for, Megan (Reenie's primary physician assistant) called last Friday because she couldn't wait until Monday to deliver the news that her tumor markers have decreased. Exciting news but we weren't done yet, Monday Dr. Baridi and Megan as excited as medical professionals can be, delivered the real tangible news that her PET scan showed massive improvement, as Megan explained it there was only one (1) (uno) , a singular hypermetabolic (cancerous) node, and that one has decreased in size and malignancy since her last scan in July. The last scan in July was not good, it had showed tumors throughout her abdomen and into her pelvic area, and today no signs of activity in those areas......today we can breath a little easier, today we thank God, our support group, and our medical team , today is a great day...as I said at the start can I get an AMEN... Reenie is not done yet, and this news I believe has given our warrior some much needed strength to continue this fight. The treatment will continue for 3 more cycles (months), through the holidays with more tests in mid January, so were not done yet but we have seen some light at the end of this tunnel.
Love to all and thank you for your thoughts and prayers...

Now we wait....and pray....and believe

Monday October 25th we have a date with our oncology team to discuss the progress of our warriors treatment. It has been 2 months since tumor markers were drawn and that showed an improvement after 1 months treatment of the new drug Navelbine. And it has been 3 months since her last PET scan and the start of this new treatment. Reenie spent this week being tested, which as we have found can be a nerve racking week. This week Reenie had a small procedure to clean out a dry socket that was in her arm from where the port was removed last July, so hopefully this will help with the healing process of that area. The tumor markers were drawn yesterday and the PET scan was today (Thursday) and results will be Monday. Our fighter did get a much needed break from treatment this week, this was her hydration week with no chemo. We look forward to this week, Reenie needs this stoppage to build up strength to keep this fight going, this takes so much out of you , she has had days when she barely gets out of bed, but then the next day she pushes to lead a somewhat normal life style, taking care of her house and her boys and we make sure herself. She will get out with friends from work for lunch, maybe a dinner with her circle of friends, we found this chemo may be working but it definitely zaps her of strength. One of the highlights in the last month was the special mass at St. Stephens for cancer patients and survivors. Reenie was able to attend the mass with her fellow cancer fighter and friend Debbie Markham. The mass was a moving tribute to the on going fighters in this battle and those that have fought and won. Reenie had many family and friends also in attendance to show support with love and prayer...a pretty powerful combination. I know I have said this many times in the blogs that she amazes me with her inner strength and resolve, I wonder why her and not me, and I believe the realization is because she is stronger and more determined and her support base is unexplainable ...the love and kindness shown to her and our family doesn't stop...so Reenie is not only fighting for herself but for her family and her friends. So this Monday is a big day in our Pink Warriors treatment, so please keep Reenie in your thoughts and prayers, she gains her strength from you her angels...Love to all and again you have blessed our family in so many ways with your kindness.

Surprise..Surprise ..Surprise..and they're all good surprises...for a change!!!

September..the month that football starts, the month when fall begins and oh yeah the month of our warriors birthday. September 25th is the actual date but  the celebration can be anywhere from a day to 2 weeks, and that's just fine with me. As Reenie got together with the cheer moms a week and a half ago it was a birthday dinner for our girl surprise number one. Last week end the high school friends got together for their annual trip to Sister's Lake Mich. to celebrate Reenie's birthday, but to her surprise they ended up in  Oak Brook for the weekend to shop and eat, along with another surprise her girlfriends from New Jersey and Houston came in for the get together. Surprises two and three.
 A couple of weeks ago at chemo Reen had a little wheezing going on so they performed a chest xray to see if there was anything happening. The chest xray was not conclusive so now the recommendation was "lets do a CT scan". Man it always seems like good news is short lived (previous tumor markers being good) we got to enjoy that for about 15 minutes. We received the news of the scan last week and the lungs were fine some scar tissue from previous surgeries and past infections, but there was a bonus. The CT scan was of the chest area, and compared to the last PET scan the tumors were decreased in quantity and size...surprise number four and just wonderful news...this chemo is helping!!!
Well Reenie has enjoyed her birthday month, she is getting through the pain and fatigue with your love, support and prayers and the belief that this chemo is working, the battle is ongoing so she needs the continued thoughts and prayers. After all the get together, the dinners, the presents, Reenie celebrated her actual birthday with the news that she now will be sharing that birth date with a very special person Quinn Ainslie a beautiful baby born to Megan and Mike Darcy, daughter fo Maureen and Jim Scobey, it has been a good month.
Reenie sends her love and appreciation for all the cards and birthday greetings.

I think Pink is your color!!!

Its amazing as I sit here today and watch my wife fighting the battle of her life and realize 100s of thousands of women have dealt and are dealing with the exact same issues. I watch Reenie each day fight through the pain, the sickness, and the unknowing and I wonder how she manages to persevere. I was able to see the inspiration last week when Reenie's family (Shannon,Kristen,Ryan,Reen's mom Maureen and myself) spend a day with the Pink Heals Tour. Reenie set out last Monday to see the Pink Fire Trucks that travel the US each year in support of women battling breast cancer. The Fire department has always been special to our family, Reenie's dad Bud was a Chicago Firemen for 30 plus years, Josh, Kristen's husband is a fire fighter in Cicero and our son Ryan has completed a fire training course  and is continuing his education that he hopes will land him a career in the department. So the combination of fire trucks and a breast cancer awareness program brought our family together for one of those special days that we don't mange to share often enough. Reenie was the star in Homewood, she donned the Pink fire apparel and took pictures with the crew from both departments (local and traveling) . She posed for numerous pictures for the host support group and many family pics as well. The members of the Pink Heals tour helped Reenie share her inspirational message to others by writing a message on the trucks cab and we spent some time reading the messages of others as well. The truck is filled with messages from 1000's of women who are fighting the same battle our warrior is involved in. We payed a visit to Matteson where 2 more trucks from the tour stopped, Reenie met other women going through treatment and they share stories and hugs, and more inspiration. I know that Reenie gains strength from her family and friends, from knowing she handled this before and from her doctors and nurses and from prayer. I now know her experience will give others strength, her messages on the Pink trucks will inspire others to keep going to "Keep fighting like a girl" as I know the messages have inspired her and our family, like the mothers day walk this day was for Reenie to wear her badge of courage for all to see and she was most definitely "Pretty in Pink"
The last few appointments for our girl have been very encouraging, I said a couple of weeks ago the "eye" test showed improvement well so did tumor markers that we received last week, the cancer cells and tumors are responding to this new chemo...so please keep the prayers and good thoughts coming Reenie's way. The problems are and probably will be during treatment the side effects of infection, low white counts and fatigue, but this post is staying upbeat because it was a good week for our warrior...got good news, spent some time with family and friends and this is how "PINK HEALS"

Love to all....keep praying the miracle prayer!!!

Pack a suitcase or pack a wound

The calender says its time for another school year, time for a White Sox playoff run, time to celebrate Kris and Josh's first year anniversary and most importantly time for some encouraging news about our warrior. The past few weeks have been really difficult for Reenie, our fighter is tough but so is this treatment. She has to push herself to get through the day, lots of pain meds and lots of pain. It has gotten to the point where she is losing her nails and easy tasks are almost impossible. Yet she doesn't complain but will become sad, last week she had a great day on Thursday only to be knock back down on Friday when her visiting nurse felt her surgical wound looked infected, it was, so back on antibiotics and stay close to home. The antibiotics made her nauseous and on Monday she became sick so they backed off on some of the medication. Our girl is still receiving care at home, she needs to have her pick line flushed daily and the site where her port was removed has to be monitored for infection. It was a year ago we were packing for a long weekend and a wedding this year just packing wounds. Reenie has been on her new treatment since July 21st for a total of 5 cycles of Navelbine with daily doses of Femara the hormone therapy. The doctors are waiting until she has completed 8 cycles before any testing, PET scans and tumor markers will be done. The encouraging news we have had is that the EYE test, the visual examinations done the last two weeks have shown an improvement in both look and feel of the tumors. We take this news as a positive but we can't get too excited as we know this beast is a mother @&#*$% and we really need to see an improved scan and markers....but this is a move in that direction, so keep those prayers coming our warrior's way, she needs them for her strength and spirit. The Haas' family sends their love and appreciation to all family and friends you guys are our rock...thank you
And thanks to our special Tuesday flower man....you have no idea how much Reenie appreciates them!!

Who is this person you call the Warrior

Well the journey has had many turns the last week and a half. Wednesday July 21st (Shannon's birthday) we had our appointment with our oncology team to discuss the PET scan results and treatment change. But first our warrior who never stops thinking of others had to deliver a wedding gift to one of her Physician assistants that she made her self, a wine basket with numerous bottles of wine for the new couple to share on many different occasions that Reenie had outlined with labels on each bottle, a time consuming and thoughtful gift for someone special to our fighter.We expected that the scan results would tell us what we already kind of knew from the tumor markers, that the current treatment wasn't working as hoped. We were right, but the scan was not as bad as it could have been yes the tumor cells have increased slightly and spread around the abdomen, but it has not metastasized to the bone or any organs. Our fighter was on to another chemo therapy drug Navelbine and a new hormone therapy drug Femara. That day would be her first infusion of the new drug and she tolerated it, at least no allergic reaction which when starting a new drug is also always a worry. So now we pray and hope and believe that this will slow and stop the progression of this $%&*!@# animal, feel free to insert your favorite obscenity at this point, mine has 7 letters. Another turn in the road came Friday evening when visiting with her friends her arm that has her medi-port became sore and red, a possible infection was brewing. Saturday July 24th our combatant was admitted to the hospital to begin IV anti-biotics and try to clear the infection, We were hopeful Reenie could keep the port if the infection cleared up, but after 48 hours of IV's the infection wasn't clearing completely so the port needed to come out. Surgery was scheduled Tuesday to remove the port in her arm, now we needed a new access point to stay on her new treatment schedule, this was a priority and the nurses and doctors at Metro South knew this and came up with a plan to make sure Reenie would get her chemo on Wednesday. They inserted a pick line called a Power Line into her chest Wednesday morning and released her that afternoon in order to receive her scheduled treatment...I'm not sure warrior adequately describes how this girl is fighting, it is absolutely amazing to see what she is going through, how strong she is, how much fight she has, and how graceful she does it, does she cry, yes, is she mad yes, but she puts her makeup and her new wig on and you would never know she was fighting the fight of her life. She looks amazing at all times. Thursday Reenie was feeling a little better after her stint in the hospital and second treatment, she spent the day with Maureen, and Kristen stopped by with a new top that would hide the Power Line, this was definitely a better day. Friday came and Reenie was given an experience  that not many of us have the opportunity to share, a VIP pass into the Bon Jovi show Friday night from Dave and Brenda, now Reenie knew of this gift earlier in the week, but it did not look like she would be able to attend I really never thought she would feel up to to it by show time...I was wrong. Reen was sent home on IV anti-biotics so the nurse came over Friday afternoon and after she left our fighter said she wanted nothing more than to spend an evening with her husband downtown on the lakefront, or was it nothing more than to see and touch Jon Bon Jovi....anyway she was able to do both. The evening was awesome, great food and drink, spent some time with our friends the Scobeys and Carneys and the seats were amazing and yes our warrior touched the Bon Jovi (I'm guessing that's a good thing) hey it made Reenie forget about things for just a short time, and that made it all worth it. We stayed the night downtown with yet another gift from our friends the Lykes...Thank you, our friends are so amazing, helping us through this trying time, our family is steadfast and strong, Reenie is gaining strength through each of you... I thank you...and the definition of a warrior is REENIE

Love to all

Big Week Ahead...NO WHAMMIES

The week ahead will hopefully provide us with some much needed information and direction. Last week we received the results from the tumor markers drawn right after the long holiday weekend. The markers did show an increase which usually means that there is more activity. Last week was the 8th dose of taxotere which was the agreed upon amount of chemo before another PET scan. The PET scan is scheduled for tomorrow Monday with results expected Wednesday and I believe a decision will be made to change the treatment regiment. The taxotere might have slowed down some activity but it has not stopped or more importantly not completely killed the bad cells. The last few weeks have been difficult for our fighter, she has been able to make most of our planned outings or get togethers but hasn't really felt good doing it.   Reenie and I were able to spend a day and night with with the Scobeys, Carneys and Kirks at Jim and Maureens and we did have a wonderful meal  and a great time with friends. We were also able to attend the wedding of Shannon and Kristen's friend Nicole and her new husband Phil Stockmal. Like I said Reenie is determined to try and make most engagements and each time I am amazed at how great she looks when I know she isn't feeling that good. She puts on her wig and makeup, a new top or dress and looks beautiful. Those that don't know her history and even most that do can't believe she is battling the monster everyday...she really is doing it with grace!. Reenie was also able to spend a few hours today with many of her cousins at a birthday and graduation party for her cousin Maureen's daughter Katie another wonderful time. But with the reality that today is Sunday end of the weekend and a new work week is ahead our warrior has much more to contend with, the unknown, the change of treatment, she needs some good news to pick up her spirits, something to build on, so keep the prayers coming Reen has a big week ahead. Thanks to all who have been sending prayers and well wishes our way and of course all the great dinners..you guys are the best love to all

Fire works....but does the chemo!!! Happy 4th

In this season of cookouts, graduations,pool parties and fireworks, I've realized the events  we look forward to... Reenie not so much. The chlorine stings the sores or nodules, the sun is no longer her friend and the heat well if you can't use the pool to cool off, the heat's no friend either. This past week has been a reality check  for our warrior, beautiful weather she can't enjoy like she used to, and that has been a major disappointment. She hasn't been able to get out as much lately either since the treatment has been increased, she has become more tired and has had ALOT more pain. We are unsure of this new pain she is experiencing, she still gets bone pain from the shots, but the past few weeks the nodules on her abdomen have been very painful, is the chemo working, not sure, are the nodules creating scar tissue, not sure. We will learn more in the upcoming weeks. We will have tumor markers drawn this week with results July 14th which will also be the 8th dose of taxotere and another pet scan will be scheduled. Determination will be made then whether we continue this course or start another treatment. This schedule will be followed only if there are no more delays like a week ago when Reenie's white count plummeted and her treatment had to be delayed 5 days. Reenie has been bummed lately with having to miss a few events but is hopeful to get out over the holiday for a visit and have friends back for the Tinley firework display and maybe a couple days in Michigan with the Scobeys and Carneys if she is feeling better. Reenie wants to thanks her Angels of love who have made meals and taken us out this month, you don't know how much that means to her (us), thanks Kathy, Noreen, Jim and Carole and especially Dave and Brenda for arranging the dinners and driving schedule, our fighters spirits are lifted by every ones prayers, visits, meals and calls..love to all keep saying the miracle prayer.

Pain Pain go away.......come back never!!

Well as we walked on mothers day in support of our warrior and all the women in our lives that are or could be affected by this monster that doesn't fight fair, the message of the walk was HOPE, FIGHT, WALK. Walk we did, with family and friends, fight is what Reenie is doing each and every day, and HOPE, is what we are doing each minute. Hope that this treatment is the one, hope that Reenie is pain free, hope that our fighter continues with the strength and determination that she has displayed throughout. Well the rain has finally stopped and tomorrow is suppose to be a better day, lets hope so! Reenie has completed one round of the newest chemo treatment (Taxotere) she is tolerating it fairly well, I say fairly because after the first two doses she became nauseous 5 days after treatment, we think that may be under control. The nueropathy has continued, and the bone pain in the hips is back because of the need for the shots to increase the white cells, so fairly is the best way to describe her toleration of treatment. So far the treatment has not brought about the positive results we were hoping for, but our team is asking us to give it some time that we may not see results for a couple cycles, that's were the fight comes in. To not be able to see positive results yet go ahead and keep taking the poison, well that's some kind of strength, and that's were the hope comes into play again. So we will continue this treatment of Taxotere, the dosage has been increased and there will be no off week, it will be continuous. We will keep the hormone treatment of Faslodex going and the targeted cell killer Avastin, and a heavy dose of prayers. Reenie is still trying to be normal, get out once in awhile, have visitors and enjoy Ryan's hockey games. The Chicago Blackhawks winning the Stanley Cup and the Sox taking 2 of 3 from the Cubs lifted her spirits, oh those were my spirits that were lifted, anyway it gives us all hope!!!
Reenie sends her love to all...thanks for every ones support in her fight..we need you and your prayers
Oh and sorry for the late update...

Round One, Round Two.....Round Four

Some of the things that we take for granted, that we don't think are special, that are so mundane and everyday that we don't know we take them for granted. Wake up and decide "I'm going to run to TJ Maxx I need a shower gift", go to lunch with a friend, your daughter asks " want to take a ride I need shoes"  or watch your son play hockey. The past month our fighter stopped chemo and started a hormone therapy treatment, less fatigue, less pain, her body had some energy. What a month, the roller coaster slowed down, the bumps felt manageable and the turns less fearful. Reenie was able to start enjoying herself, she was able to shop, drive over to her moms, catch a game and do yard work all things we fell are pretty routine but to her pretty special. The month was capped off with as our warrior put it " the best day I have had in a long while"

that was last Sunday also Mothers Day. On Wednesday Reenie had her second hormone treatment scheduled and it was also an appointment with her oncologist Dr. Baridi, we would review the last month and her latest tumor markers and a decision would be made to continue this course or start a new one..well we are starting a new one. The markers showed what we feared that the hormone treatment hasn't really helped yet (we were told it may take 6 to 8 weeks to see results) and we don't want to wait to see if it will work on its own. We all decided, Doctors and family that we want to start a new chemo, the month off was awesome, I think it helped Reenie's body get healthy, her mind get refreshed and she knows how it feels to "feel good again" and that is our ultimate goal. We are starting 3 cycles (3 months) of Taxotere given each week along with the monthly hormone treatment, we will draw tumor markers each month and a PETscan in July. We had a PET done on Monday to give the doctors a baseline of which to work, the tumor markers and PET showed the cancer has increased, but has not spread to any organs or to the bone which is always the fear, the doctors have had success with this treatment so our 'Pink Warrior' has a positive outlook and a renewed sense of fight, the last month was like the minute between rounds only she didn't just sit on the stool and listen to me coach, she enjoyed life .....

Love to all, thanks for all the prayers and thoughts

Reenie asks that you "pray longer,faster and harder"

Walk don't run!

Well it's taken me a couple days to try and put into words our weekend experience and I still don't know how to express it.  You see and hear the commercials about the breast cancer walks and how it can be rewarding, uplifting or emotional and life changing and think REALLY a walk, well I can attest it was every thing the commercials say they can be and more. In just a short time Reenie was able to gather a team of  70 plus family, friends, friends of family and family of friends, generated over $2200 dollars for breast cancer research and got to spend the day with each of them. Not to sound prejudice but "Reenie's Pink Warriors" also looked the best (great job on the shirts Kris). I think its remarkable to gather this amount of important people in your life for a moment like this and being able to accomplish this on Mothers Day, pretty cool. Being able to raise money for the cause is kind of rewarding and when all this research is able to help our wives, daughters, nieces and grandchildren well that is definitely life changing. Seeing your wife, her kids, her family and friends come together for her, very uplifting and quite emotional, I now understand the commercial. When you looked at Reenie on Sunday morning you didn't see a breast cancer patient, you saw a beautiful woman in the moment, the moment of Reenie. The sun was shinning and so was Reenie, I don't know the last time I saw her so happy, and for that I'd like thank each and everyone one of "Reenie's Pink Warriors" she smiled and enjoyed the whole day and she walked, she walked the complete course. Reenie was determined to not miss this day, 2 weeks ago the odds looked like 100 to 1 she would be able to walk to the car let alone 3 miles. Our warrior took a cortisone shot in the heal 1 week ago and couldn't walk for 2 days, like I said she was determined to do this walk. Reenie was able to start the day with her good friend Debbie Markham, who was, we are happy to say walking as a survivor, Debbie finished her treatments last month. The two girls have been an inspiration to each other and unknowingly daily inspirations to all of us followers. Debbie also had a team in the walk with a great turnout, 2 friends on a mission, job well done.
We completed the day with a cookout at Kristen and Josh's and spent the afternoon with our kids, Reenie's brothers and their families a couple friends and Kristens wonderful extended family..this was a good day, no this was a Great day.
Now its back to business for our fighter, we see the oncologist tomorrow (Wednesday). This will be our first visit since we stopped chemo and started the hormone treatment. We will receive our results from the tumor markers drawn last week. The doctors will assess Reenie's progress and determine whether she will continue this path or need to start another chemo regiment. The lack of chemo has helped Reenie build up strength and enjoy a more normal life style, but we need results so tomorrow is another big day.
Thanks and love to all "Reenie's Pink Warriors"

I think the roller coaster has been hyjacked !!!

Again I have let too much information get built up before putting my thoughts to print. Two weeks ago Reenie was about to get her third dose of the chemo drug Gemzar but was unable to because her platelets were too low and there was a fear that she could have a problem if she was to start bleeding for any reason. We had to delay her treatment until that count came up and there was no medical help to increase the platelets just time....which seems EVERYTHING is predicated on...need time to get her biopsy results...time to schedule an additional opinion with the University of Illinois oncolgy department...time to see if the Gemzar is working....time to get our doctors on the same page ...time. Reenie was able to get her treatment 4 days later so those 4 days or that time was spent being anxious which is now our normal frame of mind these days. Fridays treatment seemed to go ok but the weekend was HELL for our warrior, felt tired and the bone pain and musle ache was worse than the past few weeks. Sunday Reenie woke up with a swollen left arm and severe pain, now what we thought, well we have hydration Monday so we will see the docs then and explain the muscle aches and the swollen arm. I woke up Monday looked at the pain Reenie was in and thought I need to take some time off work, this could be a wild week....it was. Monday afternoon the doctors saw the swollen arm and thought "blood clot" but how could that be, the treatment causes the platelets to drop so clotting is not a problem, or so we thought. A trip to Metro South hospital and an ultrasound later we were now dealing with a blood clot. The technician explained that he was going to ultrasoumd each arm because thier facility demands that, I guess there are some facilities that only do what is ordered..good thing the clot was found in the right or opposite arm. This means more shots, shots to thin the blood, so back to the doctors office for the shots. Tuesday a new day and a new doctor, we had decided that once the cancer came back and was resistant to the second treatment of chemo we need to seek other opinions and thoughts on the case. We had scheduled this appointment weeks ago but had to wait, time to gather information, lots of information, tests,scans,diagnosis...lots of information to pass along to the University and schedule an appointment to see their director. We met with 3 doctors, one being the director of oncology for the University of Illinois and we were impressed, we were informed and we were encouraged. Encouraged being the obvious most important feeling walking away from our meeting. Before I get too far ahead with the University doctors,On Monday the day before, Reenie's regular doctors, before shipping us immediately to the hospital for the ultrasound, told us that one of Reenie's numerous weekly and monthly tests came back showing she was menopausal..this as it turns out ...big news. Reenie was always borderline and fake menopausal which determines certain treatments some are pre-menopasual and some post, we never knew for sure so this was sort of big. We now can start on a hormone treatment which will give us another line of attack. So before we left they gave our fighter a monthly shot of Faslodex which will be her hormonal treatment, which is actually another form of chemo but really doesn't have the severe side affects...I'm thinking this is good. Back to our meeting, Dr. Mehta said that the recent finding of being post-menopausal is the way to fight the beast and whoever requested this last biopsy (our Kristen) was brillant.we can now use this hormone treatment..Faslodex, I think I have a new favorite drug. He also felt that this should be the only way to fight this at the present time, he is not one to throw alot of combo medicine treatments at his patients and he had some credible backup and findings. So now lets get these two doctors together for some discussions..need time for that, later in the week that will happen. Still waiting for some biopsy results we had appointment with our surgeon and appointments with our primary to go over the increasing prescriptions and then finally chemo hydration day, yes this would be a wild week. Really I'm not sure if the roller coaster has left the track or it has been taken over by the energizer bunny, because it just isn't stopping anytime soon. So at this point our team of doctors are ALL leaning toward treating this beast with the hormone therapy drug Faslodex and ceasing the chemo therapy drug Gemzar. If this works, and we already have seen some benefits, smaller bumps, no increase in marks or bumps Reenie's quality of life should improve and that is the proverbial WIN WIN situation....Friday the day we had nothing scheduled, wouldn't stay that way too long. We recieved a call Thursday night that Shannon our oldest daughter was possibly having issues with her pregancy and had an appointment Friday morning, so Reenie as always would be there for her kids, took Shannon this morning to her doctors  to find out that her pregnacy was terminating. Shannon's rock her "mama bear" was with her this morning to console and explain how every thing happens for a reason, reasons that may take years to figure out but reasons none the less....maybe we needed another angel to look over us, and get us off this F$&#!%* roller coaster.
Love to all...